I've been getting a lot of credit lately from coaches and players for the games and awards they've won. And it's nice, y'know?
Everyone likes to feel appreciated. But to be honest, I'm feeling a touch of imposter syndrome. Guys, I've got to confess something: I don't give a sanctified shit about sports. It's true. I know what Al Michaels said, but USA Hockey just played better than the USSR that day. I had nothing to do with it. Tim Tebow was the beneficiary of good DNA, a great defense, and a rock solid kicker. It didn't hurt that his opponents early on shot themselves in the foot, but that's not my fault.
Honestly people, does it even make sense to you that I'm putting my righteous thumb on the scale? If I was, wouldn't Notre Dame or Baylor, or Liberty win the title every year? Wouldn't the Angels or Saints have a lot more hardware? And thank me that I DON'T care. Otherwise, what would I do with Duke? A Christian school who named their sports teams after my nemesis? That feels like a fuck you!
But I digress.
Think about it
Right now, people are starving, dying of diseases and violence. Some are depressed to the point of suicide, and I don't lift a finger to help them. But you think I'm divinely intervening in the FBS Championship? And no. I don't lift a finger to help sick people. If I did, you'd take them to church instead of the hospital. And no, I don't work through the doctors either. If I did, you wouldn't need malpractice lawyers.
While we're at it, awards season is starting. I didn't inspire any movie about a cover band, or any song with the words "bitch", "ass", or "y'all" in the lyrics. Honestly, I've never inspired any music, but if Bono wants to throw me some love, I'll take it. Just don't blame me for any hick, or misogynistic bigoted, or other stupid nonsense.
Luck and hard work
Here's the thing, humans. If you've worked hard at your trade to rise to fame and fortune, congratulations! I'm happy for you. Truly I am. But I didn't do that. You got there through a combination of extraordinarily hard work and extraordinary luck. Not one or the other. Both. You were lucky to have DNA that allowed you to have your body, your vision, your ears, your spatial awareness. You were lucky to have coaches, teachers, and directors who knew how to bring out your best. You were lucky to live in a place where those skills are valued. And to capitalize on that luck, you worked your ass off to develop those skills.
No ass-kissing, please
Remember, it isn't arrogant to acknowledge your effort. To thank me for it just comes off as false modesty. Or worse, ass-kissing. Thank the people who helped you along the way. Not me.
Because remember, if I helped you win, that necessarily means that I caused your opponents to lose. Not just them, but the person you beat out to earn your spot on the team, in the starting line-up, etc., the scholarship you earned, may be the same one someone else was counting on to escape poverty or violence. Do you really think that's how I roll? Picking winners and losers arbitrarily? No.
So look, humility is good, as long as it's genuine. But please stop giving me credit for the efforts of humans. You and they deserve the glory.
Go Sportsball!
Love,
God, aka Jay Rogers
Humanist Society of New Mexico, A Nonprofit Corporation * P.O. Box 27293, Albuquerque, NM 87125-7293 * Contact@HumanistsNM.org
